1. You consider the partner only as a temporary option.

Even if you try to convince him and yourself of the opposite, in your heart, you understand that this is not the person with whom you are ready to spend your life. “There is nothing wrong with relationships that will not last long; they are also part of our experience,” says psychologist and coach, a specialist in the field of interpersonal communications Preston Ni. “At the same time, it is worth remembering that a new partner can use your unstable psychological state and force you to something that you are not ready for (start living together, go traveling or combine a budget). In case of your refusal, you get punished with coldness and detachment. On the other hand, you also risk injuring a person if he treats you sincerely and you are truly dear to him.”

2. You are attracted to the care and attention that you receive.

We are looking for someone who surrounds us with love, gives warmth. Accompanying positive emotions help to cope with pain and regain confidence. Try to be honest with yourself: is this person really dear to you and you, in turn, are also ready to give? Or do you just use him/her as an emotional donor?

3. You call your partner only when you are lonely.

In this case, we rather need a temporary comforter than a person who is ready to be accepted into our lives. “The infantile features of the offended child are flourishing in us,” says Preston. “We call a partner as our parent and protector only in those moments when it is bad and painful for us. When we feel more confident, we do not feel a strong need for his/her presence.” Be sure to visit https://j4l.com/women.love, not for rebound or anyway, but to establish a strong bond with someone, trust me, you won’t be disappointed.

4. You want your former partner to learn about new relationships.

One of the strongest signs that you are still emotionally living in the past is the insistence that the former knows that you are no longer alone. Many openly post the details of their new personal life on social networks or tell about this to common friends, with the expectation that the “message” will be delivered to the addressee. Not only the desire to cause jealousy can hide here but also the deep need not to break the connection. It is important for us that a person who was close to us and whom we still do not let go of remains a symbolic observer of our life. This complicates mutual understanding with a new partner and affects his trust in us.

5. You are projecting the features of a former partner on a new one.

Consciously or unconsciously, we begin to look in a new person for what we liked so much… just recently. It can be a body type, hair, or eye color, interests, and lifestyle, in a word, everything that can remind us of a former love. However, attempts to reconstruct a departed relationship are always doomed to failure. This does not bring us closer to a new partner, but only prolongs our experiences. To open your eyes to such a relationship is to have a great will and great mental health, but still, be sure to check out https://www.cnn.com/health for all of the health-related news and articles.

6. You remember the former partner when you communicate with a new one.

“The main problem of the relationship which is built almost on the wreckage of the former one is that we did not have time to reflect on our past, realize what happened, and really let the person go,” says Preston. “In this case, the constant return of thoughts to the former partner, even at those moments when we are happy with another person, is quite understandable.” However, it is impossible to build a new relationship without doing this important inner work.

7. You are not ready to include a new partner in the circle of people close to you.

Introducing a new partner to your family and friends is an important part of its integration into our lives. Often, we avoid it because, in our heart, we understand: this relationship is only a “substitution therapy” and probably will not last long. We rather perceive them in the “you and me” category than “we.”

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