Growing up, we are reliant on the love and affection provided to us by our parents in unwavering amounts. The care that they gave to us as we found our feet in the world can never truly be repaid, but there will come a time when the roles will have to be reversed to some extent.

One day, your parents won’t be able to do all the things they love to do, and they will require a little extra help here and there. It’s so often the elephant in rooms, especially as time does tick on by, and the need for care increases. How do you broach the subject to your mum and/or dad who has enjoyed a lifetime of independence?

Likely, they won’t want to feel a burden to you, not wanting you to give up your spare time caring for them as you have your own life to lead. You should be as respectful as possible because it may be hard for them to accept that they aren’t in the prime of their life any longer.

Talk to your Parents

Hold an open and honest discussion with your parents, with a cup of tea and some biscuits of course. Ask them if there is anything that you can do to make things easier for them on a day-to-day basis – possibly even doing the weekly shop, cutting the grass, a little bit of DIY etc…some of the little things that add up over time.

Let them know that taking care of them isn’t a burden to you at all as they may just need this reassurance. Don’t come on too strong, though, because you cannot force them to accept your help and they may not yet be ready to give up the level of independence that they have right now.

Can you Give the Care They Need?

There is another question that needs to be asked in all of this, which is: can you realistically provide the level of care that your parents need? Whilst you may be willing to wait on your mum and/or dad’s hand and foot, are you capable of tending to any medical needs that they have?

While many believe that one day their parents will move in with them during their later years so as they can care for them, is your home suitable for their needs? What if your parents are not able to get up and down the stairs? What if they require a walk-in bathtub? If this is the case then you may need to seriously think whether inviting your parents to move in with you is what’s best for all parties, as heart-breaking as that may be.

Finding the Right Care

If you are unable to provide the necessary care for your parents as they enter their twilight years, don’t beat yourself and do not feel guilty. What you can do is ensure that they are given the level of care that they need, which may mean looking up the best care homes in the area. Before you even begin to seriously look at the care home option, discuss this with your parents as they will ultimately have the final say whether they make the move or not.
To give you an idea as to what care you can expect, this Sheffield nursing home makes a point of offering luxurious accommodation as well as a high level of care from all members of staff. For many families, knowing that their loved ones have round-the-clock care from qualified practitioners provides the peace of mind that helps them to sleep at night.
The time may not be now for you to consider any of this and your parents still enjoy an excellent quality of life. One day, however, that time will come when you will have to step up and look after them just as they did you all those years ago.